Asking For Help is Hard! Here’s Some Practical Advice for Formulating Your Ask
Asking for help is hard!
It’s the number one thing my coaching clients struggle with. And I get it! It can feel uncomfortable, maybe even a little embarrassing. But it’s also one of the most important skills you can build, especially in a tough job market.
📉 Government jobs have taken a big hit recently. The federal workforce lost 7,000 jobs in June and 69,000 since January (and that's not including the multitude of you who have left or are looking to leave by choice). And at the same time, private sector hiring is cooling.
In this environment, knowing how to ask for help thoughtfully and clearly can be the difference between staying stuck and moving forward. And the key?
🗝️ Approach it with empathy 🗝️
Take the time to think about what the other person's life looks like, how busy they might be, what they would need to know before deciding to devote their limited time to engaging with you. People like helping others, you just need to make it easy for them to do so!
If you find that you're not getting traction in your asks, you're probably missing one of these steps:
Start with context: Why are you reaching out to this person? Did you work together? Have a friend in common? Attend the same school? Meet at a conference? Say it up front!
➡️ "Hi, we met at the ABC conference last fall and had a great chat about public policy trends."Make the ask specific and actionable:
➡️ "I'm interested in [role] at [company]. If you're open to it, I'd greatly appreciate a short chat sometime in the next couple of weeks to hear more about your perspective on life at the company. I'd be happy to work around your schedule if you have 15 minutes to chat."Be clear about your goals:
➡️ "I'm looking to pivot from xyz to abc, and would love to hear what you've learned through your experience in abc."Give them a reason to invest in you: A bit of background on who you are and what you've done can go a long way.
➡️ "I spent the last decade building strategy for federal energy programs and I’m excited to bring that experience to the renewable energy private sector.End with gratitude and reciprocity:
➡️ "Thanks so much for considering this. If there's anything at all that I can do for you, please don't hesitate to ask!"
